Remember to Breathe

One of our new members over in the Reconnection Club recently posted an introduction in which she said she was reminding herself to breathe.

There was a time in my life when such a thing would have struck me as bizarre; isn’t breathing automatic? Why would anyone need to remember to do it?

But the more I learn about breathing, the more I come to understand that not all breathing is automatic

Survival breathing is what we do automatically; its only job is to keep us alive. Read More

The Surprising Upside to Wallowing in Despair

Despair figure with happy silhouetteWho is there among us who hasn’t felt the chill of despair at one time or another?

With the cold, gray winter enveloping so many of us, I thought this might be a good time to review some emotional survival tips, and underline the happy truth that wallowing in despair can bring rich rewards.

There is such a thing as severe depression. That’s what medication is for, and it can literally be a life-saver.

But for the millions suffering from losses in the past or the present while still going about their business, working through those sad, bad feelings with constructive wallowing can lift the dark veil and bring new life, just in time for spring. Read More

Emotions and Heart Health

In my post, Emotional Regulation is Nonsense, I wrote about why it’s more important to control your behavior than to try to control how you feel.

Recently I learned about a new study indicating that trying to control your emotions — especially so-called “negative” ones — can actually harm your health.

You can read it for yourself at

Note that the article (along with the title of the study) specifically states that it’s EFFORTS TO REGULATE negative emotions, rather than the negative emotions themselves, that create physiological stress. Read More