trauma

Conversations With Your Ex

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woman writing in notebook-fdpAre you hurting from a breakup? Experiencing relationship trouble? Sad or angry about something that happened long ago, or full of regret because you feel you hurt someone?

You might be able to heal a little bit faster using a technique developed by my friend Jody, who agreed to let me use her name in this post.

Write to Heal

After Jody read “Conversations with God,” she got creative and started writing down conversations with people — or rather, with the souls of people —  she needed to resolve things with. Read More

Forgiveness Can’t Be Forced

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Forgiveness, like Nature, can't be forcedI’m at the self-checkout at the grocery store with my partner, Mike. He passes our rewards card in front of the scanner, and an electronic female voice addresses us.

“Welcome, Valued Customer,” she intones, with all the warmth an industrial recording can muster.

Mike is disgusted. “Do they really think they can manipulate us with that ‘valued customer’ crap?” He looks at me, expecting agreement.

I look back at him sheepishly. “Uh …  That makes me feel … um … like a valued customer,” I admit. Read More

Life’s Not Fair … And That STINKS!

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Pie in faceSomewhere in Africa, a gazelle is running for its life, chased by a hungry lion. What are the chances that the gazelle is thinking, “This is SO unfair!”?

This may surprise you, but I don’t actually know the answer to that.

What I do know is that many people would say, “We should be more like that gazelle; just concentrate on doing what we can, rather than wasting time crying ‘Poor me’!”

I disagree!

Human beings are not gazelles. Read More

The “V” word

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VICTIM: What comes to mind when you hear that word?

  • Don’t be a victim.
  • She’s always playing the victim.
  • I’m not a victim, I’m a survivor.

Let me be the first to stand up and say that people should be allowed to use their own words when they talk about themselves. If you identify as a survivor rather than a victim, I honor your truth and your choice of words. But if you feel victimized, I firmly support you in feeling like, and calling yourself, a victim. Read More