self-criticism Archives – Tina Gilbertson, LPC

Do You Have an Inner Bully?

Bully tripping someone One day, almost 20 years ago, I was standing on a corner waiting for the light to change so I could cross the street.

I was spaced out, not thinking about much of anything, when I suddenly heard a faint voice inside my head.

It wasn’t so much a voice as a feeling. But it had a definite message.

Out of nowhere, it said to me, “You suck.”

Short, but not sweet.

This was how I learned I had low self-esteem; I heard a bully talking to me, from right inside my own head! Read More

ashamed girl I’m still on holiday this week, but in my absence I wanted to leave you with something nutritious to chew on.

Since I’m too busy whooping it up on vacation to moderate comments, they’re not available for this post.

However, you can leave comments over on PsychologyToday.com:

Next week I’ll share something on the lighter side.

woman looking in mirror critically Self-pity has a bad rap.

When people confess to me in therapy, “I had a pity party last week,” they’re usually embarrassed about it.

They look as if they’re admitting they made a mean face at a baby or threw a plastic cup on the freeway shoulder.

Their faces say, “I know I shouldn’t do that, but I did it anyway.”

Well, I tell them — and I’m here to tell you — there’s nothing wrong with self-pity. Read More

Anyone who knows me will tell you I’m all about self-acceptance.

Not just me accepting myself, but you accepting yourself and everyone in the world accepting themselves with love and compassion.

So it might come as a surprise when I suggest there could be any “don’ts” with such an empowering idea.

The problem isn’t with the idea itself, but rather how it’s sometimes implemented.

Have you seen the following scenario, either in yourself, or with someone else? Read More