Psychotherapist, Author, Estrangement Consultant
Making decisions is hard for many of us, and I’ve often heard that it’s because in order to pick one thing, you have to rule out all the other things you could do.
That’s true, of course. And it’s a bummer.
But there’s another factor that I’ve seen trip people up when it comes to making a decision.
(I’m sure it trips me up, too, but you know how it is. It’s easier to spot when it’s someone else.) Read More
The problem is that we started out as children.
Overcoming that fact can take a lifetime.
Children have no power.
If you had a normal childhood, you didn’t get to choose how or where you spent your time.
You didn’t decide when to go to bed or even what to wear when you got there.
You were told to brush your teeth, eat your vegetables (or face the intolerable prospect of no dessert), and go to school. Read More
More often than not, when I have a problem and need to make a decision, I ask other people what they would do if they were in my shoes. Then I decide whether to follow their advice or … ask someone else!
I’ve always thought of this as due diligence, but if I’m honest with myself, the real reason I ask for input is NOT so that I can weigh all my options judiciously like King Solomon; it’s just that I can’t be bothered to decide for myself. Read More