I specialize in supporting parents experiencing strained or cut-off relations with their adult children. (If your child is a minor in someone else’s custody, I recommend searching for a family reunification specialist, as I do not work with those situations.)
- Strong relationships
- A sense of purpose
- Becoming whole again
These are the rewards of a successful course of therapy, and the best way to enjoy inhabiting yourself.
I offer psychotherapy by telephone or video to clients in Colorado and Oregon. Sessions are 50 minutes long and generally take place once a week. I don’t take insurance, as insurance only pays for “medically necessary” therapy, and I’m a relationship specialist.
If you live elsewhere, and are the parent of an estranged adult child, I offer short-term consultation, which is not the same as therapy. Please see my Consultation page for details.
My greatest strength as a therapist is my ability to get to the root of a problem quickly.
The questions I ask are designed to direct your attention to areas you might not have fully explored yet, giving you a clear view of what was previously in the shadows.
Once we’ve identified exactly what’s going on, we can begin the work of healing the emotional wounds that usually accompany
- relationship trouble
- low self-esteem
- complicated grief
and other common problems afflicting parents with adult children. We may also brainstorm solutions and do some straight-up problem-solving together.
Below are the two main concerns that bring people into my office, and how I work with them.
Relationship problems between parents and adult children
I offer compassion, healing, and practical tools for parents rejected by adult children, and anyone walking on eggshells in parent-adult child relationships. My approach to family conflict is, above all, non-blaming and non-shaming.
Estrangement from a son or daughter can severely disrupt a person’s physical, mental and emotional well-being. Sometimes the best thing you can do is hunker down for a while and catch your breath before taking any new steps.
For many parents, improving the relationship requires setting the stage through personal growth and individual healing first. I’ve seen parents succeed in reconnecting with an estranged son or daughter by approaching the problem with a full emotional “bucket” rather than feeling fragile, vulnerable, or confused.
Therapy can help fill that emotional bucket and add new tools to your tool belt. Parent-adult child estrangement is an area of specialty for me; I’ve sat with hundreds of people in this painful situation. (Happily, I can also say that many have succeeded in breaking through the impasse.)
You wouldn’t know it from watching television, but it’s perfectly normal to feel low sometimes. Life has ups and downs; we respond to them emotionally because we’re human.
Feeling sad or lonely is an authentic response to a loss of connection to yourself and/or others. And grief – in all its forms, including just feeling numb – is a natural response to loss.
Too often, we don’t have the support we need to move through life’s inevitable dark passages. We feel freakish in our pain, or worse, a burden on others.
I’m privileged to provide you with some of the support we all deserve when we experience loss or disconnection. I can also hold a flashlight to brighten the path that leads through the pain and out the other side.
A good DIY resource for dealing with difficult emotions is my book, Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them.
If you’re not a current client, please contact me to schedule your first appointment. Assuming you’re looking for the type of service I offer, I’ll send you a link to my online scheduling system.
Just use my Contact page to send me a message. I look forward to meeting you.
If You’re Not In Colorado or Oregon
If you’re the parent of an estranged adult child, I’m available for short-term consultation only (e.g., 1 to 5 meetings) by distance.
Such consultations are not psychotherapy, nor are they intended to replace in-person counseling with a local professional, which I strongly recommend.
And by the way…
If you’re estranged from your adult son or daughter, you might want to have a look at my book, Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child.
Your can also check out my online school for parents, the Reconnection Club. It’s a subscription-base website that offers online support including telephone “office hours” twice a month with me.
Together with our “textbook,” Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child, the Reconnection Club is a powerful and affordable place to start.