Go to Top

Good Enough is Sometimes Best

Quality checkedI recently did my very first TV interview as part of my Constructive Wallowing book tour.

As the date of the interview approached I felt nervous; I wanted to make the most of my appearance on the show, and I was worried I wouldn’t.

I pictured stumbling over my words, failing to make myself understood, forgetting to mention important concepts, and generally squandering the opportunity.

Thinking about what it would take to “ace” the interview, I quivered with fear.

I didn’t feel up to the task of excelling — especially in something I’d never done.

A book tour is a long-haul proposition; you don’t want to be steeped in anxiety the whole time.

So I decided to let go of the need to be EXCELLENT, and allow myself to be just adequate. As in, show up, answer the questions, and don’t throw up on the furniture.

My stress level immediately went down.

Instead of attempting to score a perfect 10 in an unfamiliar situation, I tried just to be open and engaged.

I could do that, I figured.

It was an act of faith that paid off; I had a much easier time of it, believe me.

Are you expecting more from yourself than you need to?

Sometimes lowering the bar produces better results. Try it and see if it works for you.

Here’s the interview:

About Tina Gilbertson

Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist, speaker and author based in Denver, Colorado. She specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children through therapy, consulting, and ReconnectionClub.com, an online support and information hub for parents. The author of "Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them" and the "Guide for Parents of Estranged Adult Children," Tina is often featured in the media as an expert on communication and relationships. Her blog on PsychologyToday.com is called "Constructive Wallowing."

0 Responses to "Good Enough is Sometimes Best"

  • Cheryl Peddie
    June 14, 2014 - 9:34 am Reply

    Awesome interview! And thanks for this post too. I’ve been nervous lately, too, getting ready for my first show as a newly full-time artist. (So also in the muck of a career change). I think I’d set the bar pretty high for myself with this upcoming show. I think I believed that this was my big ‘test’ that would determine my fate as an artist. So this article is a timely reminder that it’s ok if I’m not that perfect 10… I’ll do my very best with the goal of just staying open and engaged in the experience, just as you shared. Thanks so much for all your work and wisdom, and for even sharing your own personal experiences on your journey. There’s much to learn from there.

    PS… Am half way through your book! It’s been a source of much strength and reassurance to me. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *