Why Not Get Your Hopes Up?

Are you waiting for potential good news but you’re not sure it’s going to happen?

Get your hopes up and enjoy those good feelings till the ballots are in!

If it turns out to be a no-go, you won’t be any less disappointed than you would have been anyway.

If the news is good and you get what you were hoping for, then you won’t be hoping for it any more; you’ll just be enjoying it. Read More

Almost All Problems Are Emotional

girl cryingWhen’s the last time you had a problem that wasn’t emotional?

Car broke down? You probably made a call or two and got it fixed; no real problem there except for the annoyance and/or frustration it caused you.

Couldn’t pay your mortgage? Losing your home to foreclosure would be an “oh, well” proposition without good old-fashioned fear, desperation and grief — emotional experiences, to be sure.

I recently wrote a post about how problems are almost always emotional (and so, therefore, are solutions) over at my new blog home-away-from-home on PsychologyToday.com. Read More

What’s So Bad About Feeling Sad?

sad kittyEvery now and then, as you know if you’ve been hanging out here with me for a while, I come across an article that I wish I’d written myself.

That’s doubly true for this well-written, spot-on post by Leanne Reed, who happens to be a therapist in Portland, Oregon just like me.

I’m impressed by the clarity of Leanne’s writing, and I hope you will be, too.

So without further ado, I give you…

What’s So Bad About Feeling Sad? Read More

Emotional Regulation Is Nonsense

Every time I hear the term “emotional regulation” (or “emotion regulation”) I throw a tiny fit inside my head. And since it crops up often in my field, I’m throwing little fits all the time.

(If you ask me what time it is, and I stare blankly at you, it’s because I’m having one of these fits. Give me a moment and then try again.)

I don’t mind telling you I hate that phrase. I spit on it. Read More