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Why You’re Attracted to the Wrong People

Last week, I was giving a presentation to other mental health professionals when the talk turned to unmet emotional needs.

This is the kind of thing we therapists tend to discuss when we get together. That, and reality TV shows. Or maybe that’s just me.

Unmet emotional needs are often unconscious, and they cause all sorts of havoc in our lives. Mostly they tend to control our behavior. Come to think of it, they may even lead to agreeing to be on TV… But I digress.

It struck me that choosing the wrong person to date (or marry) can spring directly from unmet emotional needs.  So I decided to write about it. Please let me know what you think.

The post is here: Why You Keep Picking the Wrong Partner | Psychology Today

Photo courtesy of nuttakit at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

About Tina Gilbertson

Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist, speaker and author based in Denver, Colorado. She specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children through therapy, consulting and other resources, and offers assertiveness training and executive coaching for organizations. The author of "Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them" and the "Guide for Parents of Estranged Adult Children," Tina is often featured in the media as an expert on communication and relationships. Her blog on PsychologyToday.com is called "Constructive Wallowing."
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0 Responses to "Why You’re Attracted to the Wrong People"

  • Marta Frant
    October 28, 2015 - 7:58 am Reply

    I think it all varies from person to person, in this case from couple to couple. To understand these reasons we should know why they’ve started to date in the first place. What did attract them initially? What kind of person did she or he look for in each other?
    Romantic relationship has the same levels of pyramids as Maslow pyramid has. And rising up to the next level reguires flexibility and change from every partner.
    Women tend to put partner’s need above their own. That’s the biggest mistake in relationship.

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