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The Surprising Upside to Wallowing in Despair

Despair figure with happy silhouetteWho is there among us who hasn’t felt the chill of despair at one time or another?

With the cold, gray winter enveloping so many of us, I thought this might be a good time to review some emotional survival tips, and underline the happy truth that wallowing in despair can bring rich rewards.

There is such a thing as severe depression. That’s what medication is for, and it can literally be a life-saver.

But for the millions suffering from losses in the past or the present while still going about their business, working through those sad, bad feelings with constructive wallowing can lift the dark veil and bring new life, just in time for spring.

Despair isn’t something we do to ourselves; we don’t choose it. We come by it honestly, through living.

When we let something or someone be important to us, we become vulnerable to loss.

When we allow ourselves to know how much we hurt, we open ourselves to the truth that we’ve been wounded. Sometimes deeply.

We need to heal.

That’s the bottom line.

Despair is a signal that something inside us needs healing.

Click the link below to read this week’s post and, as always, let me know what you think:

3 Good Reasons to Wallow in Despair | Psychology Today

About Tina Gilbertson

Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist, speaker and author based in Denver, Colorado. She specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children through therapy, consulting and other resources, and offers assertiveness training and executive coaching for organizations. The author of "Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them" and the "Guide for Parents of Estranged Adult Children," Tina is often featured in the media as an expert on communication and relationships. Her blog on PsychologyToday.com is called "Constructive Wallowing."
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0 Responses to "The Surprising Upside to Wallowing in Despair"

  • bookishheather
    February 21, 2015 - 9:34 am Reply

    “With the cold, gray winter enveloping so many of us…”
    Sorry, this made me chuckle because I was just mentally grouching about the sunny glare against my computer screen because it was making it difficult to start reading your blog post! 🙂

    • Tina Gilbertson
      February 21, 2015 - 9:50 am Reply

      Life’s little ironies! I’m right there with you, Bookishheather. Portlandia is enjoying a nice, clear, sunny morning today. It’s weird to think that winter is actually happening right now in other parts of the country.

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